Culture Awareness

I have been raised to greet people with eye contact, a smile, and a firm handshake. This is a very important part of our Western culture and is not to be dismissed lightly. A firm handshake, not limp, and definitely not crushing is the sign of a warm welcome. It is the sign of trust, as in business when you say, “Let’s shake on it.” Throughout North America, the handshake is the traditional introduction particularly in business. It is a sign of respect and equality.

Imagine my surprise when my handshake was refused. Not once but twice.

As a Council member, I was invited to two separate celebrations, each hosted by a different ethnic, cultural, and religious group. The intention was to bring people of different cultures together so that we may come to know each other and our values better.
Men greeted each other and all other male dignitaries with warm handshakes but as my hand was extended, one older male recoiled with a very stern look on his face. The younger male of similar background rallied trying to save face – my face, which I am certain had all the signs of a deer caught in the headlights. He smiled, immediately cupped his hands together and bowed toward me. He told me that they would not shake my hand “out of respect” for me. I followed suit, cupped my hands, smiled and bowed but it didn’t feel right. I was different. Untouchable. I would not be engaged in any business as my male colleagues would be and I was to accept that.

Another social / political engagement was even more unsettling. There were certain males who because of their religious beliefs would not be recognizing me at all. They would not make eye contact. Women are invisible.

Respect. Inclusivity. Equality. Fairness. These are attributes of a ‘Character Community’. Canadian laws are built on such principles. My experience of rejection was based solely on my gender. Might I suggest that if by showing respect, my hand must be refused, then all others will be shown the same respect and their hand will also be refused? Just a thought.

York Region will be celebrating the second annual ‘Character Community Awards Celebration’ on April 2, 2008. You will find more information on the York Region Website:  www.charactercommunity.com  or you may call me at 905-771-2498.